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07 Aralık 2005

yavas yavas

16 euroluk super-multivitamin haplari fos cikinca butun gecmis olsun mesajlarini aldim, elimle yuvarladim, kucuk kucuk toplar yaptim, kocaman bir bardak suyla yuttum ve ve...sanirim artik iyilesme yolundayim. Bugun disari ciktim biraz (annenin dedi gibi bitkisel), markete gittim yavas yavas, Paris gunesliydi ben atki-bere-eldiven ve bembeyaz bir suratla, gulumsedim yolda. Bu ilaclardaki paracetamol insani bir duygusal yapiyor ki off..Sonra hemen eve dondum yorulup, ders calistim kipirdamadan. Demek ki iyilesme sureci boyleymis, parola "azar azar" herseyden; yarim sigara, iki sayfa okuma, biraz corba, biraz sokak, ama cokca planlar. Evet boyle bir zitlik var: vucudum her ne kadar agir cekim olsa da beynim normalden de hizli sanki. Surekli yapacagim seylerin eskizleri ciziliyor gozumu kapattigim an. Demek ki guc topluyorum -diyorum kendime. Gercekten yapacak cok sey var. Belki persembe normal hayata tam olarak donebilme gunudur, gorecegim bakalim. sevgiler...

ps. hera ve cul, odevlerimi unuttum sanmayin, aslinda caliskan bir ogrenciyim, bir sonraki posta..soz.

2 Comments:

Blogger culdesac said...

h�m... (cul tek ka��n� kald�rm�� simi'ye bak�yordur ciddi bi ifade ile ama dayanamay�p aniden "p�hahaha" die �eeder, heheh)

1:38 ÖÖ  
Blogger huysuz ve tatlı said...

simicim,iyile�ti�ine sevindim :)

8:54 ÖÖ  

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